The women ahead of me had their heads down. Counting coupons, it seemed. Shaking of heads, there had been a faulty count. Another try at the dog food coupons.

I thought I had chosen the short queue. You never really know. The woman in front of me picked a magazine out of the rack. Which Hollywood Stars have Double Bottoms shouted the headlines. Frantic paging to find out more about the bottom battles. The coupon dispute had ended and cash or card questions asked. Tell me, I asked the avid reader, had she got to the bottom of the problem yet? No, she hadn’t found the page. Agitation mounted as the time came to unload her trolley.
In defeat, she packed away the magazine. Oh no, not buying it, but she could get at least seven headlines suitably answered at any checkout queue, she bragged.

“Hello, how has your day been?” asked the teller.
“Not good, my arthritis is killing me,” said the magazine reader.
“Anything planned today?”
“Another trip to buy medicine”.
“Anything exciting happening tonight?” she asked, pursuing any sort of happy event. Sometimes coaxing was needed.
I secretly worked out my answer in advance. You can’t leave a teller disappointed.
“No, nothing really,” she replied.
In desperation, the weather was called upon to help out.
Drizzling yet? Forecasts of rain and other gloomy topics brought some life out of the otherwise uninteresting woman.
The price of groceries! When will it stop, she said, almost happy at yet another topic to complain about.
I felt for the teller. Her bouncy banter had been successfully quashed.
My turn. And how has your day been, then?
Oh wonderful! Really good!
Anything exciting planned for today?
Yes, the washing. I was keen to try the new brand of stain remover on special. I happily anticipated that my new Zero Tolerance would battle my stained whites into cleaner then white surrender. I was then going to relax and read a book and maybe nibble some Lindt.
She looked up. My exciting day had taken her by surprise.
Could I interest her in my sunflower seeds? I anticipated a very good crop this season and was about to use a new raising mix with trace elements.
Her eyes glazed over. Obviously not a flower girl. She looked behind me, and I followed her gaze.
A row of irritable women with piled high trolleys glared back.
I had tried. Tried to keep the happy teller in good spirits.
I wished her a good day.
She leaned forward and whispered. Tellers are forced to ask customers these questions, she explained. Some don’t answer. Some are happy to have a chance to gripe. And others won’t stop talking about their exciting day.
“But you go and have a good day, then!” she instructed with a wink. And I did.